Jurnal RiverRes, 29 Apr 16

Odd day. It is snowing outside and the weather is supposed to be bad for the next three days. I am trying to take advantage of free dump days this weekend as I clean out the backyard to help get the house ready for sale. Looks like I will be out there with a rain poncho and snow boots.

I had a meltdown at work yesterday. Is it menopause or just being tired of the situation and feeling powerless? Probably some of both. I have been here 7 years. I am on my seventh boss in 7 years. They rotate in and out and I end up having to prove myself over and over again. Is it the 7-year itch? Or am I just tired of training the next monkey that corporate has identified to climb the ladder?

My old boss told me that I am intimidating and I need to be more inviting (smiling, grateful) when a boss hands me something to do. He never had a problem with me, but he and I have a unique relationship. I struggle with my new boss. He is not a strong personality and seems subversive. He avoids me and goes to others for work he should give to me. Everyone he goes to still has to come to me for help and so it ends up being an interruption, not a planned project. If he would just come to me and say, hey - I want you to work on this with so and so; then I would do what was needed to set the other person up for success and then let them get to it. It would be a win-win. Instead I am always at a lose-lose. I do most of the groundwork and no one knows how much of my time I had to give for the other person to achieve success.

As to how I react when my boss hands me something to do, my face is a direct reflection of my internal thoughts - it is one of my worst flaws. When he hands me something, I am typically in the middle of something else. He never tells me what the priority is for his latest request, and so I end up juggling what my priorities should be without any knowledge of where things fall in the pecking order. I don't know how to fix my reactions; but I need to learn. Or do I? Is this really what I want to do?

So many questions. I feel trapped. I need to do something. Just don't stress eat.

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1272 kkal

Lemak: 42,55g | Prot: 81,91g | Karb: 144,93g.   Makan Pagi: Jimmy Dean Delights Canadian Bacon, Egg White & Cheese Honey Wheat English Muffin, Green Mountain Coffee Hazelnut K-Cup, Green Mountain Coffee Caramel Vanilla Cream K-Cup, Milk (Nonfat), Sugar in the Raw Stevia in the Raw. Makan Siang: Healthy Choice Complete Meals Country Herb Chicken, Dole Caesar Salad Kit. Makan Malam: Burger King Grilled Chicken Salad with Croutons & Fat Free Ranch Dressing. Camilan/Lainnya: Dry Roasted Cashew Nuts (with Salt Added), Raspberries, Yoplait Light Fat Free Yogurt - Very Cherry. lagi...