I know I'm having a meltdown tonight I feel so hurt! (2) bottles of wine, I want drama, i want to hurt, I want to smash something, but I'm just quietly getting loaded. I've got those safety guards. I want others to feel the pain they've inflicted on me. Damn, I've been so proud of myself for the last 2 months.
Needless to say, I wont be weighing in. Every day is a constant struggle to keep myself proud, moving in the right direction, propping my self esteem up. Then Bang, some things happen that just wants you to lie down and die.
It's like the last straw that got the best of me. Maybe it's karma and I deserve it. Could be, I've inflicted great amounts of pain because I knew no better. God knows, it was never intentional.
I truly believe what Dr. Phil says, 'the healing begins when you believe that the other side is sincere that he/she knows understands and feels the pain inflicted.' Problem is, sometimes the other side does not have the maturity to understand the pain inflicted.
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